June 23, 2019
Surrendering should come easy for me, after all, I surrendered my will to drugs; doing anything to find, acquire and use them.
I only sought help when I was beaten – but even then I did not surrender.
Most of my pain comes from fighting, not surrendering.
In fact, when I surrender, the pain ends and hope takes its place. I begin to believe that all will be well and, after some time, realize that my life is much better as a result.
I feel the same way I did when I admitted I could not control my using – relieved, free, and filled with fresh hope.
A willingness to begin recovery is to walk blindly into that unknown – an enormous act of courage, hope, and trust.
What is most feared – an admission of defeat and a sign of weakness – comes to be truly understood as a sign of great strength.
