May 23, 2019
40 days clean and 38 days smoke free!
I have hurt and disappointed many people.
Initially I thought that if I said sorry, all would be good.
But as I continue my road to recovery I’m realising making amends is NOT about me. My motives for apologizing were an effort to purge myself of the guilt I feel for what I’ve done.
This is selfish.
Amends are action based and about the person to whom I’ve done wrong.
And some things are better left unsaid because by saying them, it could do much more harm to the person than any good.
Making amends is Step 9 for a reason.
IT’s not about clearing MY conscience, it’s about taking responsibility for the things I have done that have harmed the ones I love.
I ask my spirit guide for patience and strength as I continue to work the steps.
